with or without her... i will survive

on paper i should have a person to guide me and to teach me the ropes of being a functional missy. remembered i mentioned that there are special duties to be done by different people assigned to different rooms? well, those that i had worked with were all so nice and willingly to teach me. but.... *sigh*

we briefly met and our 1st interaction wasn't to pleasing to me. today is my offical working with her. she didn't proactively teach me anything. she continued to speak in an 'alien' language which i can't understand since i was borned and raise as a chinese kid. is it retribution? maybe so... sometime it slipped my mind that there are other ethnic groups around me and i will comfortably switch to mandarin while talking to others. but i had made an effort not to and i always try to bring the other ethnic groups' people into my conversation! why then am i treated that way!?!? *sniff*

a friend once told me to keep clear of this ward and that ward cuz the culture is pre-dominated by some ethnic groups. i know how it will affect the smaller ethnic group working there, they will feel neglected and unwelcome. but i have a mindset that says "its ok. once they get to know that you are nice and there to help them they will improve. they will embrace you into the family. even if you can't understand them 100%. its ok." i must keep this mindset and must never let things weighed me down cuz i am a little too sensitive... if i get all bothered down by these crap i will develop some mental illness someday. so i must remain positive and bright afterall God will be me guide.

so in conclusion... i must survive even if she didn't teach me anything. i will survive cuz there are always others that are willing and friends that are encouraging. I MUST AND I WILL survive... my target is to be a cool, steady RN. by 3 months and by 6 months i will be one of the best assest my Sister can have in her care.